How Text Messaging Ruins Relationships

The title is pretty self-explanatory, therefore eliminating the need for an introduction, so I'll just dive right in!

1) No face time
I don't know about you guys, but I text with people I hardly ever talk to in "real life" as I'll call it. When I say "real life" I am including on the phone. Why? Because then you can hear expressions, tones, laughs, tears. It's just more personal, making it possible to actually carry on a relationship with someone. Clacking away on an impossibly small keypad as your main means of communication with your SO? Yeah, not exactly a bonding experience.

2) I can't hear you!
Sarcasm, anger, sadness, sincerity, etc. are all impossible to distinguish within a text. This has spawned many a confusing conversation, if not an argument, between me and my BF. He thought I was mad; I was being sarcastic. I thought he was kidding; turns out he was serious. You get the idea.

3) Tick tock, tick tock
Again, I don't know about you guys, but I get so frustrated waiting for texts. I sent it to you 10 minutes ago and you still have not replied! I have been waiting! Are you ignoring me? Are you busy? If you were going to be busy, why didn't you tell me instead of making me sit here for 15 minutes waiting for you to answer my question!? By the time your SO does finally respond to your text, you're in an exceedingly foul mood from having to wait so long, which will likely put the conversation into a downward spiral.

4) 160 characters
There is no possible way most messages can be summarized in the small number of words SMS messages allow, therefore forcing you to send multiple texts, a frustrating endeavor in itself. Add in the fact that your SO may interrupt your flow of messages, ask a question, or some other nuisance that requires you to type yet another messages to explain your previous ones. You are gonna get carpal tunnel and all because of that dimwitted little... Well, you get my point.

5) What?
There is absolutely nothing more frustrating to me than having there be so much time between text messages that, when you respond, I have absolutely no idea what your response means because I cannot remember what I sent. Either I will have to flip through my "Sent" folder to find it or I will have to ask you and then you will get frustrated, causing me to get frustrated and then YELLING ENSUES! Or rather, CAPSLOCK ENSUES!

6) Tech-Not-So-Savvy
Too many tales have been told about people finding things on their SOs' phones that they consider incriminating. Whatever you find, you are likely to assume the worst and blow it out of proportion before actually talking to your SO. If there was no texting, none of this would have happened and you could have gone back to good ol' computer-snooping.

7) "we need 2 tlk"
While I have never experienced this (and, god willing, never will), I know too many people that have received the infamous text message breakup. This is so cold, so low, that it should be perfectly legal for you to go over and key their car, shave their dog, whatever! At least call, seriously!